Maybe Not Curbing Emotions
My buddy Michael explained, вЂњThe вЂtraditionalвЂ™ marriage agreement says, вЂIвЂ™ll love you forever and do not love another,вЂ™ but that is a vow most canвЂ™t keep, and most likely why 50 % of contemporary marriages result in divorce or separation.вЂќ Michael claims he’s got a desire to have numerous deep connections that are emotional in friendship.
We have actuallynвЂ™t cheated to my ex-boyfriends, but We confess to experiencing desires at times and confusion about those desires. But I quashed those feelings and published them off as вЂњwrong. because I happened to be in a monogamous relationship,вЂќ But according to polyamory, those arenвЂ™t wrong вЂ” they truly are normal. But as a result of my personal worries we had, I felt I couldnвЂ™t express those feelings that we might break up and the unspoken agreement.
Emphasizing Strengths and never seeking вЂњBetterвЂќ
HereвЂ™s a serial monogamistвЂ™s playbook: you leave somebody for the opportunity somebody else could be better.
In polyamory, there is absolutely no вЂњbetter,вЂќ only вЂњdifferent.вЂќ And that means you donвЂ™t need certainly to keep a very important thing if it is missing something вЂ” you merely include another to meet that lack. If an individual partner is wonderful and intellectual although not especially social, that doesnвЂ™t need to be a deal breaker.